Have you been hurt by someone who seemingly does not care to be in your circle of friends anymore? Maybe it is even a family member who has shut you out which is even more bizarre. Could be you have been mistreated at work or in a club you are in or yes, even in church! No matter how hard you try this person keeps hanging on to their anger. They keep building up offenses. But you must charge on with life and appreciate the friends who really are friends and let what I call 'toxic friends' go. Let go of your right to be angry. Anger will just keep festering. Hurt will build up and walls will be constructed emotionally that can not be torn down. We do not know why some people choose to not let go of things but we know it is humanly impossible to force someone to like us. Only God can change a heart and an attitude. Even though a person may not say "yeah I forgive you" you have to choose to forgive them in your heart. People change and somethings happen with some folks. Misunderstandings occur and no matter how hard you try you are an outcast. Move on my friend to real friends. Learn from this painful experience and try the best you can with God's help to get beyond it and stop obsessing. Pray and let God have it. That is all you can do.
Division is not from God. The enemy comes to steal,kill and destroy it says in John 10:10. For sure, Satan loves to split up all kinds of relationships. That is why we have to recognize the true enemy is not the person but Satan. If you could only get the other person to humble themselves and sit and talk and pray, things may be better. Many are too proud to do this and thus the division continues. But even some so called Christians who know better will still choose to hold grudges. It makes no sense and only brings glory to Satan.
God desires us to have a pure heart and a heart willing to forgive. If you are harboring resentment against someone it is time to ask God help you release that to Him so your prayers are not hindered. 1 John 4:20 says "If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen." Having issues with someone and not wanting to speak to them or thinking bad things about them is sort of a form of hate wouldn't you say? It is time to come to God with a pure heart and ask God to transform your heart into a heart like His.
God commands us to forgive. Matthew 6:14-15 says "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." In 1 John 4:20 it says "The man who says, "I know him," but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him." There is no way to sincerely love God but hold hatred and bitterness in your heart towards someone.
Remember when Jesus was being crucified and in great agony having been drug through the streets carrying his cross and being spat upon here he was hanging nailed to a huge cross between two criminals. He had done no wrong and had every human right in the world to get back at them. This was not Jesus nature and it is not to be ours. It says in Luke 22:32-34 "Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with him to be executed. When they came to the place called the Skull, they crucified him there, along with the criminals—one on his right, the other on his left. Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”And they divided up his clothes by casting lots." If only everyone could be like Jesus then we would put lots of lawyers out of business as there would not be everyone trying to sue to get back at people or get their way.
Psalm 66:18 says "If we harbor sin in our heart the Lord will not hear us". Unforgiveness is sin. You have to give up your right to hate and hurt people and you have to say " I forgive this person" even if they have not asked to be forgiven.
Hebrews 12:15 says "See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many." You have to give up bitterness to truly forgive. I am sure everyone reading this has been wronged by someone at one time or another. Humanly it is hard to forget about it but keeping it going will not help matters at all. Be like Jesus and not the world and let it go! You just have to ask God to help you to let things go.
I will end with Colossians 3:13 which says "Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."
PRAYER: Lord it is hard when I have been wronged or hurt to forget about it and move on. My mind wants to dwell on it and my heart is hurt. That is not what you want us to do. Lord help me to give up being angry and bitter and move on and in the future when other bad things happen to me to give them over to you right then and there. In Jesus Name. Amen.
Included a link from a Promise Keeper song I always liked.